This blog consists of my many fandoms, and cats. I also post quite a bit about my daily and personal life. Amongst these you will find things that make me laugh, things that make me happy, things that turn me on, things that upset me, and just general things.
My FAFSA hasn’t gone through because they need extra paperwork
The website to get said paperwork has been down for 24+ hours now
The college I’m going to doesn’t have all the classes that I want to take
I want to take algebra but it says that I don’t ‘meet the prerequisites’ so I would have to take foundations of math at first. I’m not paying $200 for that shit.
I found out that another college here offers marine biology and zoology courses
I applied to said college but they want a lot of paperwork from me that I don’t even know how to get ahold of
I don’t even know what all classes I should take to get the degree I want
Hell, I don’t even know what degree I want!
I just want to work with animals. That’s all I know.
So WTF am I supposed to do?
Then, my parents want me to work full time and fully support myself and I get that but I also want to go to school and try to move on with my life and it seems like they’re not backing me up on that
I can’t afford college
I can’t afford living
What even do I have to life for?
I have my roommate/best friend and my parents and my sister. My roommate works full time, my dad is moving to North Carolina, my mom is going to be working two jobs, my sister goes to school and doesn’t particularly want much to do with me. I have no other friends. But, I have two cats.
I’m not even working right now.
But when I do, it’s going to be an office job. The same thing I’ve been doing for the past 3 years now.
I’m going nowhere in life and I don’t see things changing anytime soon.
Why should I even try?
Why am I even here?
What’s the point?
I feel worthless and unneeded and unwanted and pointless.
My existence feels pointless.
I thought college would give me more meaning and excite me, but it’s doing nothing but stressing and freaking me out.
So I realized how alone I am today when I texted my best friend to ask if she wanted to accompany to my new drs’ appointment in Flagstaff next month and she said she doesn’t know if she can get the time off to do it and my mom can’t go with because she’s running the new business and my dad will have moved to North Carolina by then and I don’t have anybody else.
I literally have no one else.